Saturday, December 10, 2011

I DO KNOW HOW YOU FEEL.........

As you have read my story on here before you will see that i was molested twice by two family members, my uncle and my stepdad. Both lasted a while but with my stepfather it lasted a lot longer than with my uncle. I have a point i want to make. Someone on my twitter account who no longer follows me told me i don't understand her because i wasn't raped. Maybe i don't understand what its like being raped but when my stepfather was holding me against the wall and moving his body back and forth i felt like i was raped. So in ways i do understand how you feel...........................

I know what its like to be afraid and not being able to tell anyone.
I know how it to have to deal with feeling guilty, like it was all your fault.
I know how it feels when you don't have anyone believe you or refuses to hear the truth.
I know what its like wanted to KILL YOURSELF over it.
I know how it is to cut yourself.

I can keep going down the list but you get what i am trying to say here. I understand how you feel. I still deal with the emotions simply because I had remain silent for 10+ years. I never had anyone to talk to besides my sister but because she was also molested by our stepfather i dared not tell her because i did not want to be a burden on her shoulders. But the fact of the matter is that i could have told her and maybe i would not felt like i was online in this. For a while i felt alone. It wasn't until i joined twitter for Mariska Hargitay and saw that she had a foundation (Joyful Heart) that educated and empowered women of sexual abuse, child abuse and domestic violence, and met other survivors who helped encourage me to speak out so i did. Thank to one known as Teri Lynn Hatcher (Not the real actress), she helped me out alot and i am thankful to have met her. 

So the reason for this post is to show you 1) i felt like no one would understand and 2) show you that i now know that there are others like me and i do understand how you feel. We are SURVIVORS. NO MORE VICTIMS. ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. LETS STAND STRONG AND HOLD EACH OTHER UP!!!

8 comments:

  1. Tara thank you for sharing and being real. Safe hugs

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  2. I know how you feel too. I have been molested and raped and they both will eat away at your soul if you let them. Maybe the acts are described differently because of the person who did it, but honestly, they're both evil acts on another human being.

    Thank you for opening up and sharing your story. Your courage helps others like me to tell mine.

    Namaste

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  3. Thank you for sharing a part of your story. It is a horrible thing to happen to us. We never asked for any of this. Sometimes i wished it never happened but then i see how so many people are being touched and inspired by my story its amazing. I want to continue to encourage others. Thats why im in school majoring in Psychology to become a counselor to help others.

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  4. Very true and I love your last line- we should be holding each other up!

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  5. Thank you. Yes i think we should especially those who do not have a support system. Thank God i have one now. Its incredible but as survivors not everyone will understand what we had gone through. WE should help each other and by there for support. Together we can end the silence one step at a time. Thats my goal through my blog to help others speak out and to be their voice.

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  6. regardless of whether you were raped or sexually molested.. the act by the perpetrator is done to dominate the victim and its disgusting..

    the emotions and aftermath are the same. I was raped and its not the physical aspect that bothers me so much as the betrayal of trust.

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  7. Thanks and yes its the betrayal that hurts the most. In my case it was an uncle and my stepdad. My stepdad was the one who raised me and the fact that he molested me was hurtful.

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