Friday, April 22, 2011
Im going to start off by saying that no one in my family knows anything about my abuse. Not even my mother. She refuses to believe anything or that her husband is capable of molesting. So with that said im feeling down because im 23 yet my mom treats me like an out of control teen because, im not proud to say this, but Ive messed around with guys (sex wise). i understand i lost her trust because i told her ill be careful and not fool around. its my fault and i deserve that. but the things is that it doesnt click in her head that maybe something happened to me to cause me to act the way i do when im in a relationship or when i just meet a guy. i know that because of what i went through when i was younger had an affect. i attach myself to these guys and try hard to not lose them which goes back to the way i would act with them. trying hard not to get involve with anyone until i have fully healed and can be able to be with someone and not be afraid that im going to lose them or they hurt me. make sense?